Three Racist Moments

1. Watching the telly the other night, I found myself compulsively eye-rolling at the Oscar Mayer Wiener commercial where three children -- The Little White child, the Little Asian child, and the Little African-American child -- are standing around when a Wienermobile drives up. Wow! The Wienermobile is SO COOL! It looks like what would happen if you mated Greased Lightning with a giant kielbasa.
http://www.kraftfoods.com/om/Wienermobile_main.htmIt is so cool that it makes healthy little American children want to snarf down products made of pork snouts and chemicals like they're CANDY!

The window of the wicked cool Wienermobile rolls down as the kiddies are oohing and aahing and who do you think the driver is?
Why, it's White Mommy, of course!
Of COURSE it is! And she's going to feed her white child and his little token racially diverse pals some Oscar Mayer Wieners, because this is America!! Why did I somehow just know that it wasn't going to be Asian or Black mommy behind the wheel of that Wienermobile?

2. On that same night of telly viewing, another delightful commercial featuring Diverse Children.
This time, a schoolbus. Three or four little boys are comparing their homepacked lunches. They are showing off various mommy-made things like sandwiches and home-baked cupcakes wrapped lovingly in wax paper. The little boys are all white, white, and white. A fourth boy, the only little black boy in the bunch, opens HIS paper bag. What did his mommy send him off the school with? Why, a Kraft Snackable Lunch Item* consisting of plastic packaging and chemicals designed to look like "food!" YUM! In this case, as the announcer cheerfully informs us, this delicious lunch is just plain cooler than anything the other kids will have! It is! Because what could be more delicious and satisfying than sitting all by yourself in the cafeteria like the little boy on TV and eating a cracker with a slice of pepperoni (it might be fairer to say "pepperoni") and grated cheeze on the top! And I think there might even be some "tomato" sauce to dip it in! Them's eats!
What could be more hip and cool? Who WANTS a real sandwich or a home-baked cupcake anyway?

Am I reading too much into this? Am I being overly sensitive to the message here? What were the great Madison Avenue minds thinking when they intentionally chose the ONE black child to eat the crap, and alone in the cafeteria, too? Looking kind of sad and brave, like he knows how poisonous this product is?

PeaceBang threw a pillow at the television set over this one and yelled some cuss words. She believes that Snackables might as well be called "Satanables."

3. Listening to some golden oldies while cooking tonight, I hear Elton John's "Island Girl" which feature the lyrics,

She's as black as coal
but she burns like fire
And she'll wrap herself around you
like a well-worn tire.

PeaceBang stands there draining linguini into the collander and wishes some rocking island girl would pen equally offensive lyrics about chubby white gay men, just for equal time. A WELL WORN TIRE?? Isn't that charming. As if any hot island woman would ever wrap herself around Elton John with a ten-foot pole.


* Guess who owns the Oscar Mayer brand, too? Kraft, boys and girls!