The Cartoon Bubble Over My Head Says...
My life stinks, I am angry and nonproductive, I don't WANT to write this, I am not passionate about it, therefore I hate my doctoral program, I don't want to work this hard, I am grieving the end of summer, I'm wicked lonesome, the light is fading and autumn is coming, therefore I'm going to die soon, I should start worrying about Christmas, my stomach is churning, I want to go out and have some dinner and relax, I can't because I have to write this paper, everyone is out tonight having fun but me, I'm never going to get my office cleaned, and I still haven't opened the box or set up the new printer that I purchased in JUNE of 2005, therefore I am a loser and a failure. Therefore I should just go have sushi, come home and play the banjo, and moo sadly like a cow until bedtime comes and I can wake up the next morning and hate myself some more.
The only good thing about being a cow is that they have very long eyelashes, so when you look sadly down at the ground and moo, your eyelashes brush your cheeks.
(I got this photo off a web site called "People For the Beautification of Cows." I think they are seriously confused.)