Friday, March 03, 2006


Originally uploaded by Peacebang.
So I sez to the doc, "Doc, ya gotta help me. All I do is cough. I cough so hard my eyeballs pop out. I cough all night long. My coughing keeps all the dogs in the neighborhood up. I'm shaking loose my guts, doc. I get no rest. I'm like an old lady now. I can't put on my eyeliner straight, I'm coughing so much."

So the doc says, "You got bronchitis. You got to breathe this asthma medicine and it will give you a kick, like you just drank sixteen cups of coffee, but you won't be coughing. At least I think you won't."

So I go to the pharmacist, the cute red haired guy at the Stop & Shop, and he says, "Hey, I like your haircut," and he gives me this magical little canister of Albuterol and I shoot myself in the mouth with it and bam, the coughing stops -- mostly -- and I take a five hour nap and now I feel like a new woman.

Thanks gods.


Blogger Jess said...

It really is magic stuff - our 8 year old is asthmatic, and when he gets awheezing, this is what he takes. Man, does it jump him up though, and it absolutely kills his appetite. He hasn't had serious symptoms in over a year, but he went for a couple of months once with 2 puffs three times a day and he barely ate anything and was running around like a maniac non stop.

So.... not only will you stop coughing, but you'll lose weight and be super productive! Wheeeeeeee!

Hope you're on the mend soon, you sound miserable. ;-)


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