Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Obesity Steakhouse

I went to Outback Steakhouse ("no rules, just right!") last night, which is usually a depressing no-no for me, but I was at the mall and hankering after a quick burger, so I went. First of all, there is something soul-destroying about the uber-cuteness of their Australian theme. My heart goes absolutely cold at the word "bonzer."

When I walked in, a cursory glance around the place revealed that 90% of the diners were grossly obese. I was by far the slimmy of the evening, and that's WACK, jack. I remembered Jungian genius James Hillman's shocking and offensive (but possibly true) point that other nations hate Americans partly because we're so ugly, and we impose our ugly, fat, inelegant personal aesthetic on every landscape we inhabit.

This is part of the reason I am personally committed to never, ever wearing sneakers as a tourist in other nations.

I'm heading up next week to spend seven to ten days in O Canada. St. Saveur, then Montreal. Any blogger friends from up there? Wanna have coffee?


I'm going to walk on the beach now, and then hunker down to start my TWENTY PAGE PAPER on "the body at worship."

I'd rather be "the body at hammock" today.

Resolution of my "Sweeney Todd In Concert" date dilemma: I'm going with my friend who played Anthony in the production I did ten years ago! Sometimes things just work out. His wife is due with their first child in three weeks, so he's taking the opportunity to get out with a pal one last time before the Baby Storm hits.

4 Comments:

Blogger Paul Wilczynski said...

I was impressed a number of years ago when I read that the absolutely worst food in all of existence in terms of being unhealty was the Bloomin Onion at Outback.

11:06  
Blogger Narrator said...

Peace, my dear, I am up in O Canada -- but in Ontario.

I love this post. I still love your whole blog. May I add you to my favourites list?

23:40  
Blogger fausto said...

You might stop by the Unitarian Church of Montreal and see if former beliefnet denizen Robin Edgar is still picketing them for being too humanist. He was making something of a career out of it a while back. If he's still there, you could do both him and the denom a big favor by advising him as a Christian UU minister that you don't have a beef with UCM and neither should he.

Or you might decide, as I might in your respectable shoes, that it would be too much of a busman's holiday.

10:24  
Blogger PeaceBang said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:28  

Post a Comment

<< Home